The other day, while my dad I were shovelling the driveway, he started wondering out loud about what he’s going to do once I’m gone if there’s ever such a heavy snowstorm like the one that just occurred. He thinking of finding a service that would clear the driveway for him. I insisted that I was only a phone call away. I was serious about it. If he ever needed help, I’d come back in a heartbeat. He seemed hesitant though, like he didn’t want to be bothering me. The fact that he’d rather call on outside help sort of irks me.
I worry sometimes. My father is getting old. He’s not as strong as he used to be. Sure, he has a snowblower to help clear things, but is it enough? I’m sure my mother could help out. She’s used to lifting heavy patients at the hospital, you know? Though, that’s not really the point I’m trying to make. More and more, they’re getting to the point where my help would be more and more useful. At the same time, this is the point in my life where I need to pull away and form a strong independent foundation for my own life. It’s the act of striking a balance between these two needs that is sort of troubling me.
I’m not the type of person that can just leave them alone. It’s always been the three of us. It’s like a three-legged stool isn’t it? If you take away one leg, you won’t be able to sit on it like before. Although, I suppose this isn’t necessarily the best analogy, right? The two of them are more than capable of living well without me. No matter what, they’ll find a way to manage. I guess though…even though that may be true, I still intend to be there for them because I love them. And I know that they’ll be there for me in the same way.
Things are already starting to become more complicated, aren’t they?
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