The other day, I read something on Julius’s blog that caused me to thing back to my time in the gifted class in elementary school. Back in grade 5, I was made to take an IQ test of sorts. I actually remember thinking about how fun the darn thing was. It was all like a small game show in my mind. Anyway, I think my teacher noticed that I was advanced and getting a little bit bored with the material, so she recommended that I get tested. My parents, God bless them, had no clue about all of this gifted business, so just consented. Hey, whatever works, right? When the results came in, it was recommended that I be transferred, so that was that.

When I joined in grade 6, I was joining a class that had already had one grade to bond together. You see, the gifted programme started in grade 5. So I have to admit that I didn’t really feel like I could mesh with everyone at the time. Hell, I was already socially awkward–almost used to being an outcast and ostracized from my time previous years for the greivous sin of knowing too much–so, I figured it was just par for the course. Thing is, despite not being entirely able to mesh, this was the first time that I was in a group where I felt like I belonged. How can I describe that? It’s more like, it was the first time I understood that no, being smart wasn’t something that should be stifled or hidden for the sake of fitting in. Being in that class, among similar people gave me free license to let me mind expand, to which I’m entirely thankful.

As you could imagine, a class like that sort of generates a bit of a clan mentality. See the school didn’t consist of purely gifted classes. There was also the “regular” class. God, I hate that term because it makes me sound so bloody elitist. Anyway, just due to the nature of the split, there was a definite rift between us and our counterparts. It wasn’t uncommon for them to taunt us and call us “brainers” as a derogatory. I don’t ever recall us fighting back. I mean, it’s not like we did anything to intentionally put us above the other class. We just put up with it. Early on, we were in our own silos, not really interacting with the other half. Within our classes we relied on each other as a survival mechanism.

That all sounds well and good, doesn’t it? As is the nature of things though, things weren’t so clear cut. Within our class, there were outcasts among the outcasts. I consider myself fortunate. I think I was more one of those floater types; I didn’t really belong to any group and was really on the periphery of a lot of things. I felt like I was just “there” and didn’t get much attention. For my personality especially, I think I was fine with that. I think I had too many eccentricities and quirks for that to work. You know, I might even consider myself borderline outcast, but really that was self-imposed. Anyway, as an observer, looking back now I almost feel sorry for some of the people that got the brunt of the taunting. That’s not to say some of it was undeserved, but God, I pray that some of them have gotten so much stronger from having survived all of that. I know some of them have and have gone on to bigger and better things.

Through the wisdom of the teachers, we eventually did start sharing certain subjects with the other class. See, both sides had the same curriculum, but maybe we had a little bit more enrichment. Does that make sense? Anyway, over time, due to all that integration it seemed like a lot of the sniping died down. By grade 8, I could swear that it wasn’t so much an us vs. them thing anymore. We were just the other class. Sure, still “brainers” but whatever.

A lot of this just sits in my memories as a time when I was just coming into my own, trying to build a sense of self. I am thankful for this period as a time when I realized that I’m not so broken. It wouldn’t be until late high school that I’d start feeling that way again, but…that’s another story.