School is starting again tomorrow for many people across the country. I’ll admit that I’m still finding it a little bit strange to not be included in that grouping. As the years pass by, I’m becoming more and more removed from my scholarly life. I’m not saying that I miss it, but it makes me pause to think that something that I’ve spent almost two decades at is slowly morphing into a “past life.”
So, all this time since graduating is part of the act of shedding old skins and redefining myself. I’m active. I’m working. I’m generally all right with the way things are going.
Why the heck am I analyzing all of this now (again)? Well, one of my old classmates recently attended the wedding reception of another classmate. He told me all about it yesterday. Just due to the nature of things, he ended up running into a lot of people from our old class. Some were raving that they’d found their ideal jobs, living it up in various places in the States. Others were in med school or law school, obviously aspiring to be something greater. Now, as my friend was telling about these encounters, I could imagine exactly how he was feeling. We’re in similar situations: we have average jobs here in the big city, and are content to just be in the workforce. I suppose we could be doing better for ourselves, but…does it really matter?
That’s the question, isn’t it? Does it really matter that I’m not in med school, or going to a dream job, or changing the world on some vast level? If I can live with what I’m doing and not feel terrible angst about it all, then I must be doing something right. That’s not to say that I’m not aiming high for myself. Of course I am. I have goals and aspirations as much as the next guy. What’s the difference then?
To be honest, I still haven’t figured that one out yet. I think…I have found enough to keep me stable and grounded for the next little while, and it’s from this foundation that I can build on my sense of self. I know that everything will be OK.
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