By my own admission, today I’ve been feeling kind of lost. Not in a geographical sense but one where I almost feel like I’ve kind of lost my way. I’m not in a panic about that at all, if only because I tend to feel that way every year around this time. See, the holidays are fantastic because they’re a good opportunity to force myself to get some rest. Thing is, after a while, not having a routine is kind of making me crazy. Yesterday, I was fortunate to have the day off due to the office moving locations. It gave me the time to do all of the required chasing around and piecing together of documents required to pick up my car. By the end of the day though, I was genuinely confused. I had to announce to myself out loud several times: “It’s not Saturday today; it’s only Friday.” Yes, today feels like Sunday, but it’s only Saturday. I have to forgive myself a little bit for almost believing that the weekend will just continue on indefinitely, know what I mean?
How am I feeling right now? How do I describe this? Well, I kind of imagine myself riding a bike at the top of a hill. I’m high up enough that clouds are kind of blocking my view down. I guess that would make the hill a mountain, wouldn’t it? Anyway, right now I’m just circling the top of the mountain on my bike, just waiting to start barrelling down it. I have some idea of the things I’m going to encounter, but who knows what nature will toss my way? Sure-footed mountain goats? Full-licensed sherpas?
Well, soon enough I’ll be in routine again. A little while into it I might well be cursing the fact that I’m not on vacation. Heh, seems like there’s always something to complain about, eh? Perhaps, on some level, the fact that I’m not entirely at a point where I’m content with everything is enough to keep me striving for bigger and better things, right? I’m still young–this is not the time to rest on my laurels.
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2 comments
wegrit says:
Sun. January 4, 2009 at 11:06 am (UTC -5 )
Trust me, I hear you. I’ve spent the last semester on an eternal weekend and with the holidays it’s been made even worse. I was convinced on Thursday that it was Saturday. I am *really* looking forward to February and starting school again. Onward to those bigger and better things.
Jay says:
Mon. January 5, 2009 at 10:17 pm (UTC -5 )
Yeah, feeling useful is entirely a good thing. You’re working on your PhD, right? That requires a whole other level of patience. Taking in more of N.I. ought to keep you occupied, I hope.