Honestly, what the hell was that?
This morning I was just resting peacefully on the train waiting for my stop to arrive. When I pulled in, I grabbed my bag off my lap in preparation to get back on my feet. In my half awake stupor, I was surprised to see this stream of water appear in front of my eyes. At first I thought I was dreaming, but no, it was very real. So real, in fact, that it landed directly into my crotch. No, not even off to the side or anything: it was a freaking bullseye. I looked up, and found that the stream was coming from the ceiling of the car. THE HELL. I suppose at least it wasn’t from some guy pissing on me, because that would be much much worse. Still.
Anyway, the doors were open, so I didn’t have time to examine the crime scene further. I stuffed my ear buds in my ears and got up. I looked around to see if someone saw me. Two guys off to the side were just in shock. I wanted to say something to acknowledge them but I had to get off. I stepped off the car and examined the damage. My khakis were visibly wet looking like I’d obviously had an accident. A saving grace really was that there wasn’t any scent of urine. I didn’t want to draw any more attention to myself than necessary so I held my ghetto messenger bag in front of me. I couldn’t help but think though that it looked like I was trying to hide something. Well yeah, I was, but it could have looked like I was hiding some sort of aroused state, except…NO.
I made it on the streetcar without much fuss and ended up having a pleasant but long ride to the office. Thing is, a few stops before my stop a friend called. So, as I was moving around I had to juggle holding my bag strategically all while attempting to have a meaningful conversation. I think I was successful, but the whole ridiculousness of the situation had me laughing. When I got to my office I just turned on my desk fan full blast at my pants. There were moments where I wanted to check my levels of dryness but I figure that pawing at my crotch could be deemed inappropriate, so I behaved.
So, all right, I just have a few questions about the incident. Why did the water come down at that moment and not at any other stop? Why wasn’t my seat wet from any supposed previous leaks? I’d assume that it would have happened there before. If we’re inside a tunnel for most of the distance, where would the water come from?
This is all crazy!
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5 comments
Erin says:
Sat. June 13, 2009 at 3:18 am (UTC -5 )
The whole thing is pretty funny! Thank goodness for the desk fan!
Kelvin says:
Sat. June 13, 2009 at 8:30 pm (UTC -5 )
Oh wow. That is an embarrassing situation. I think I would try my best to hide the wet spot that got there without me knowing.
Jay says:
Sun. June 14, 2009 at 8:48 pm (UTC -5 )
I’m glad some of you are getting amusement from my pain and anguish. OK, so it wasn’t that bad. As much as it was a bad situation, I feel I was pretty matter of fact about it. It’s not like I generated the wet patch myself, and it wasn’t one of two sorts of aromatic, so…
Wow, I kind of regret typing that last sentence, and yet I find it funny.
wegrit says:
Mon. June 15, 2009 at 6:02 pm (UTC -5 )
Okay, I shouldn’t laugh, but I will because it’s funny in a Murphy’s Law kind of a way. I’m impressed with how well you took it all in stride though!
Jay says:
Thu. June 18, 2009 at 10:02 am (UTC -5 )
It’s OK. I acknowledge that it was a unique situation. I wasn’t about to run around fretting about how to dry myself. If I did I might as well just draw a big neon arrow pointing to my crotch: LOOK HERE!