Honestly, I don’t think being an only child makes me whiny or an inherent complainer. No. I think if I come off that way it’s because there’s some aspect of the situation that’s outside of my control. I mean, I have a good read on situations. If there’s something that I need to do and accept, I can do it. However, if I feel like I’m ambushed or boxed in without options, I’m not going to be entirely happy about it. Who likes that? Pinning my reaction on birth order is just plain wrong.
Ugh.
So when the client requests you visit them on site for a few days, and everyone is encouraging you in subtle and not so subtle ways (think: anvils from the sky) that it would be prudent for you to clear some time in your busy schedule to go….I guess that means you should go.
Damn.
(Chicago suburb, here I come! 
)
I originally expected yesterday’s improv class to cover the topic of emotion and how to connect in a scene. Right at the beginning of the class though the teacher decided to switch topics and cover status instead. I was a bit apprehensive at first when I heard that we were looking at this topic because of the potential for ugliness and stereotypes. I quickly dropped the fear though because it became apparent pretty quickly that society functions as it does because of differing status. There are people of high status, and people of low status. The majority of people will be somewhere in between the extremes and will raise or lower themselves depending on the situation. Interactions with each other are kind of predicated on our perceived status levels, right? In terms of improv, knowing how to play status and how people at different levels are bound to interact tends to make scenes all that more interesting.
There are a good number of simple truths about status and what people see and would like to see. In general, what type of character do we like to see on TV or in a movie? We tend to gravitate toward the underdogs, right? We’re interested in seeing the underdogs rise and seeing the people at the top fall. In terms of a scene, it seems to be a good setup that will make the audience feel good. Sure, it makes sense but I don’t think I would have thought of something like that until the teacher mentioned it.
Now, people of high status are usually in control of a situation, right? A person in control does not need to act in anger of forcefully. There’s a calm assertiveness about that type of position. For a character that’s close to the top of the heap but not quite there, there should probably me a bit more forcefulness in terms of interactions. Such a person tends to be that way to make them seem higher status than they probably would be. That person wants to act like he or she has control. A person of high status should need to act that way–they just are in control.
On the flip side, people totally on the bottom of the pile should be reserved and really focused inwardly. They would act like the world is out to get them and should be afraid to interact with it. Someone close to the bottom would be fearful and reserved, but probably wouldn’t be afraid to reach out here and there. There might be a fear of a bad reaction, but at least that person would have done something. So therein lies the difference. A person of low to middle status wouldn’t be so sure of himself or herself but might act in hopes of achieving something higher. A person who’s at the bottom probably wouldn’t even try.
So yeah, that’s some of what I took in on Monday. In truth, it’s normal for us to be in the middle and show traits one way or another. In terms of improv knowing how things tend to play out can help to create more truthful scenes which are more engaging in the end.
Have I mentioned lately how much I enjoy this activity?
Yeah, I know I cross posted, but I enjoyed this video.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aK2F2iBVOvo
Doesn’t matter what you think of Lady Gaga or that sapphic, Miracle Whip eating, police tape wearing, dog killing video. Go watch this video. Quite epic.
I really need to work on my time killing techniques. Seriously.
This morning I got through our scheduled 18K run. It was actually quite awesome. The night before I had the sense to load up on water. Yes, I had to pee in the middle of the night, but seeing as how I didn’t have the nasty throbbing headache after the run I say it was worth it. I was feeling so good that I even added two more kilometres to make a round 20. Nice. Yes, I was tired but not thoroughly fatigued. Does that distinction make sense? Anyway.
I had plans on heading to my plyometrics class but I had an hour and a half to kill. I started to wonder what I should do with my time. I decided to head to the big Chinese supermarket to browse around. I also knew it’d be a good opportunity to get some food to replenish my stores prior to the class. Sounds good, but when I got there I was pretty much assaulted by all of the smells of good food. I ended up getting a small dim sum combo that had a few pieces of siu mai and har gow. Upon walking past the sushi bar I ended up getting a combo with salmon sushi, tuna sushi, and California roll. A quick round through the bakery encouraged me to pick up some whole wheat croissants and some carrot bread. Seeing as how I seemed to be picking up a good amount of food, I had the sense to pay for my stuff and get out of there. OK, so it’s not like I planned on eating everything I bought right away, but the fact that I got a lot for what was meant to be a time killing act, and even left sooner than I wanted indicated to me that this wasn’t the best of choices. At least, if I were to go there again I’d need to plan things out and take my damn time through the aisles.
With an hour to kill I drove down the road to a small mall that I was sort of familiar with. Last time I was there was a few years ago. Back then it seemed to be on some sort of tipping point where it could choose to become something a bit cooler, or tumble into dead mediocrity. Well, upon my revisit many storefronts were closed and the demographic was definitely older. The only people I saw there were old people getting their exercise indoors. One of the anchors of the mall is an outlet store with discount fashions. I took a look around and proceeded to walk right out. I’m not trying to be a snob, but…really? I’m totally not the target for that place. In the end, I just got back to my car, rolled down the windows and proceeded to listen to music for about half an hour.
Yeah, so that didn’t go as well as I was planning. I think next time I should just head to Best Buy or HMV. Sure, I can continue to try to search around in hopes of finding some secret place only visited by people in the know, but what’s the point? This is a battlefield where it’s not worth fighting the battle, don’t you think? Bah.
I’m in a very odd place on this whole fitness/nutrition thing that I’ve been pursuing over the past few months. After a steady decline my losses have slowed down. I’m not gaining, but I’m not really losing as much as I have been over the past while. I’m quite sure it has to do with the fact that I haven’t been quite as consistent with training. Well, then. The obvious thing to say is that if I want to get back to a point where the weight tumbles off more readily I need to pick up the training again. The thing about that is that I’m not entirely in the mood for that right now. Like I wrote a few days ago, I need a bit of a break from running so much. So, without the running factor I’ve been toying around with my food intake. Since I’m not burning so much I’ve had to cut down on calories. Thing is, that’s been pretty damn tough. I’ve been eating without denying myself much, just as long as I meet my nutrient requirements and limits. Having had a bit more freedom before, trying to find ways to cut back is a bit of an eye opener. At the same time, I know that I can’t go too hardcore on cutting back because I need the food to fuel the runs that I do manage to get done. It really is a tricky balancing act.
Should I stress about all of this? Probably not, right? There needs to be relaxed periods built into whatever endeavours we take on. Yeah, I’m not achieving the most awesome results right now, but I know what’s needed to get back to that point. And I know what my schedule will be like in the next few months. I’ll reach my milestones–maybe later than I originally wanted, but I’ll hit them nonetheless. I swear.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a run tomorrow morning and I’m hungry as heck right now. An oatmeal chocolate chip cookie is calling my name.
I’ve established many times that I’m not really someone that accepts change easily. Normally I don’t go seeking it out–usually it finds me. When it does, I adapt to the new circumstances to the best of my ability, but not before I go through some sort of overly dramatic thing where I have to re-frame everything. This is definitely one of those unstable periods. A few days ago I wrote about my job having a drop dead date. Today I spoke with some people of influence to discuss whether there’s room for me after that date. I honestly didn’t really know what to expect going into the meeting. In the end though, it became clear that, yes, there would be room if I wanted it. The only thing is that it would involve a move to a different technology than what I’ve been dealing with for the past 3.5 years. Due to this, in effect I’d be starting all over again. Right now, this fact is what’s messing with my head.
On some level it’s almost as if everything that I’ve been doing has all been for nought. All of my experience has been specific to a particular language. The change involves learning something entirely new. Despite my experience, it’s certainly not like I can dive right in and take a position of high responsibility right from the start. That alone was enough to make me feel a little bit helpless. It took me a while of self-analysis and discussion with colleagues to put it all into perspective. Firstly, given the drop dead date for my position, there are really only two outcomes that can happen. The first is that I find a new job with a new company. The other is that I stick around and join a different department. Really, how is joining a new department any worse than taking on a new company? In both cases I’d have to learn something new anyway. The big difference is that the company is willing to let me ramp up and not stuff me into something entirely entry level. That in itself is a blessing, isn’t it?
Seriously, all of this angst is really a bit of a heavy load. However, its not like it’s one that I’m really forced to carry. I could just accept everything and move on. At the same time, I think that it’s just in my nature to try to look at something from as many angles as I can just to get a better judgment. Anyway, at this point, when this change comes I’m going to do my best to grab it with both hands and run with it. I know I’m worried but when the time finally comes to perform I will rock it. I think the prospect of climbing the ladder again even has me a little excited.
Let me show you what I can do.
Umm…just a small thought:
All you can eat sushi is still kind of fun, but for whatever reason, for me its appeal is starting to wane.
What the hell is wrong with me? O_o
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