Monthly Archive: June 2010

I’m a free man…sort of

The ending was rather anti-climactic, if I’m being honest. Though, I really can’t imagine the whole thing ending with a big crash boom bang, know what I mean? All the same, there was all of this build up leading to this date, and now that it’s passed, I’m kind of feeling like “oh, that’s it?”

Hmm.

Well, I guess as of this point I am now something of a free man. Well, not really, but I have now moved on from my current project. I can drop everything and start anew. This chapter is ending, but the new one has already begun.

EPIC.

Learning to be fearless

Yes, so like I said, improv last night was quite awesome. If I’m being honest, it does feel like every class for the past few weeks has been better than the one before. I honestly think that part of it is that I’ve learned to be more and more fearless. I might dive into a scene or exercise not knowing what the heck is going on, but I’m more likely now to stick with my character or in the scene and ride with it. Before I would have broken out of character or looked around for help. Not so much these days.

I think I’m also making cool character choices. There’s a good mix of high and low status character stuff. I play around. I’ve learned to keep physical action in the scene going, even if I’m not speaking. Yes, there’s a lot going on. I’m learning!

I’m quite proud of how far I’ve gotten in this short time. I feel like I’ve got a lot of potential waiting to be unleashed. I never really expected this path to lead anywhere, so I just did it for fun. I’m still doing it for fun, but I never would have imagined that I’d get so much damn enjoyment from it. So much joy comes out of playing in a scene that just works. When everyone’s choices and decisions synchronize nicely such that the scene flows, that’s a magic that just can’t be found any other way. So awesome.

Foundation 400: here I come.

Three hundred done

Yarr, so just finished the Foundation Level 300 improv class at Bad Dog Theatre. I’m perhaps a little bit tipsy. We had a few great moments over at the bar. Perhaps at this point I kind of want to elaborate on what happened tonight, but in truth I’m just not in a position to do so. In fact, as I’m writing this post the backspace/delete key is my friend. The class went exceptionally well, and I feel like I’m sort of on a roll. Things are going well! The 400 starts next week. It will definitely be a good time. Meanwhile……….I need sleep. Blaaargh.

Ambling on the road to recovery

I’ve been in the process of recovering from various illnesses that I somehow incurred on Thursday. By Saturday, it seemed like the only remaining symptom was a sore throat. Let’s just say that I’ve really been in need of a good expectorant lately. Well, I figured that a sore throat wouldn’t keep me from doing my run this morning. We were scheduled for 16K. I thought that would be manageable. I ran fairly slowly with two other people. We were taking it easy. In the heat, there’s no point in burning out quickly. Well, about midway I started feeling a little bit uneasy in my gut. I had to walk it out a few times. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to puke or not. It felt like my gastrointestinal system from my throat to my stomach was just clogged with mucus. I wasn’t feeling well at all. I didn’t have the greatest run, but I was able to complete it. That’s all that mattered by the end. When I got home though, it seems like the act of running just aggravated things. I was running a little bit of a fever and had to lie down for a good spell.

I really need to take better care of myself. Lately I can’t help but feel like my immune system isn’t behaving properly. It’s not jut because of the recent burst of illness, but in general I’ve just been feeling a little bit weaker than I should be. Maybe it’s in my head. Why did I insist on running even if I was recovering? Didn’t my actions just set my recovery back by a few days? Time will tell, I guess. Tomorrow I will start anew. Maybe by then I’ll be farther along on the road to recovery.

This is not Toronto

Dude…

There are areas of the city that I feel fully familiar with only because I walk there every weekday while I’m at work. It’s quite mind-boggling to see those normally peaceful locations turn into protest zones on TV. I’ve had so many of those moments while watching the news.

There’s my old office behind the gathering place for the police in riot gear!
My favourite tea joint is there right beside that burning cop car!
A few days ago I withdrew money from that bank whose windows just got smashed in!

Maaaaaaaaan.

I’ve still got it!

So, I’ve mentioned that I’m in a transitional period at work, right? It’s been messing with my mind a little bit because the responsible part of me wants to carry on, business as usual. The pragmatic part of me has been actively trying to get the new team to take care of all day-to-day things. Makes sense, right? Well, this push and pull has been at the forefront of my mind for what’s felt like an eternity. Every person that I’ve talked to about my situation has told me that I have to listen more to the pragmatic voice. After all, the new team needs to get used to the workloads that we used to handle. Now, it seems like I’ve gotten good at pawning off tasks to them. Like I mentioned in my last post, the client has pretty much kept me out of the loop. That’s a good thing. The only thing is, there’s a side effect to all of this. See, the resulting detachment has left me feeling like my skills are rusting. I’m not as confident as I used to be that I have a good grasp on the project as a whole. It’s probably all just in my head, but I can be forgiven for feeling like I have no idea what’s going on anymore.

These days, when I’m asked to investigate something, I do a cursory check for the obvious suspects, and once I have an overview I send it back with an explanation, and a statement of what needs to be changed or investigated. If the task needs more in-depth investigation, I leave it for the new team. On Friday night, on my way out, I got a request to investigate a problem that a customer was having with his personal account. I passed it to a colleague if only because I was already out the door when I received the request. I thought that would be the last I would hear of it. The following Tuesday, I was asked to have another look at the problem. It seems that no one could find anything wrong with the code and left it to user error. The only thing was, the problem could be reproduced by a customer service person using that user’s account. It was quite odd. I thought that perhaps the customer service person screwed up, but when someone I trusted was able to recreate the problem I was stumped. I pulled up the entry in the database and stared at it for a few minutes. That’s when it suddenly came to me. There was a field in the record that should have been filled in with something, which it wasn’t. Well, God, I was downright pleased with myself. I filled it in as expected and everything started working. It was amazing! At the time, I wasn’t concerning myself with the cause of why the record wasn’t correct, but I was at least comfortable that the one user could finally sign in. Honestly, it tells me that after all this time I still have the skills for this team. I’ve been around the code long enough that I can spot this kind of thing. Though, knowing all that it also kind of makes me sad that it’s all coming to an end fairly quickly, right?

*aigh*

Battlefield: me

It’s unintended, but my body has become a bit of a battleground.

(For that matter, since when is illness ever intended under normal circumstances?)

Since about midday I’ve been dealing with some bad stomach cramps. It’s like my stomach is just in distress, and the distress isn’t really moving down the tract. So, it doesn’t really look like something that will just work its way through. I don’t know what it is that I ate that caused this, but I’m feeling quite ill. Seriously, if I went for my run today, I probably would have puked along the way. While that would have been a good thing, I don’t want to be known in my running club as the guy that puked. Could it have been the week-old chili? Maybe the papaya smoothie? I don’t know.

Farther up, it seems like I’ve come down with a sore throat. I knew something was developing from midday, but it wasn’t until I got home that it really became obvious. At this point, I’m having trouble swallowing. Drinking fluids kind of hurts. Probably for the best since drinking fluids seems to be putting my stomach into further distress.

All I want to do is hide under the covers and hopefully burn whatever is wrong with me off. Going to get some meds into me. It shouldn’t be anything serious, but man this really put a damper on my night.

Heat spanking

About midday, I was already actively psyching myself out of going for a run later in the evening. There were several active weather systems approaching the area, and I figured that one would hit us. Well, as chance would have it all of the systems skirted us to the north and south. Knowing that I had no reason to not go, so I forced myself to show. Really, it’s at times like this when you especially need to show up. That’s an important part of forming a good habit, right?

So, upon stepping out of the car the heat immediately hit me. It didn’t really dawn on me that it was particularly fierce. Instead, I figured that the heat was plainly something that I just had to get used to. What was I going to do, turn around and go home? Hell, no. I wanted to stick it out. I was already saying that I wanted to run at a certain speed. I wanted to take it down enough, but people were warning me to take it easy.

At first, the run seemed to be OK, but within the first kilometre or two I was already having issues. A few people who I was running with decided to take a walk break to recoup some stamina. I didn’t want to stop because I thought that I might regret it later. In my mind I yelled at myself “If you stop, I won’t forgive you!” Of course, it’s not like that was a full truth, but forgiveness wasn’t really an issue. I tried to plough through, but after a few tough hills my body just didn’t want to cooperate. I slowed to a walk and decided to rest enough before starting again. By that time I was already sweating profusely. My shirt was quite soaked. I haven’t produced that much sweat in a long while. I’ve actually been under control in terms of perspiration for a year or so, but today the weather seemed especially rough. I started up again, but quickly found that I simply had no power in my movements. From about 4K onward it was all very stop and go.

Of course, as I was running on the sidewalk I became pretty self-conscious. I wondered if the cars passing by would see my sweat-soaked shirt and wonder who this lumbering oaf was. In reality I was sure no one cared, but I was happy enough to let my wandering mind go there since it provided a distraction. As much as I really wanted to start up properly again, every time I did I quickly returned to a walk. I was telling myself that it was all in my head and that I shouldn’t complain. If I just focused, the body would follow. Well, focus is all well and good, but when there are physical limitations outside of my control I just have to learn to accept it.

I did walk a lot of it, but I did finish running it in. Interestingly, my final time was faster than some of my old training runs when I was in the 10K clinic. Yeah, I’ve come a long way, but the heat and humidity certainly spanked me tonight. If I was starting to become cocky about running, this brought me back, crashing to earth. I know I have to cut myself a little bit of slack because weather is so beyond my control. At the same time it has me worried. I mean, what if the race itself is hot and humid. I don’t know. Time will tell.

Older posts «

Switch to our mobile site