After all this time, I still have trouble accepting compliments. This was pointed out to me by an old colleague a while ago, and really I’ve been making efforts to change (sort of), but so far I’m still a bit leery whenever someone says something positive about how I look. Why am I thinking about this now? Today my improv teacher said I was looking good. I had to take a moment to examine the words in my head. I guess over-examine is more like it. Was there an edge of sarcasm? Was it disingenuous? I didn’t sense anything odd about it, so I awkwardly accepted it and said thanks.
Why not just take it gladly? Why seem ungrateful? Do I have such an opinion of myself that I can’t accept that I can be seen positively? Eff that. Seriously. I have to accept that I’m worthwhile, know what I mean? Otherwise I’m just going to end up wasting precious brain cycles on things that don’t need the attention.
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