So, if you’ve been following along, you know that I’m pretty proud of my cooking abilities. It’s not uncommon for me to post pictures of food that I’ve cooked or baked on this blog. Sure, it doesn’t come easily. For every picturesque meal there’s been something untasty, burned, or unpresentable. Despite that, I still keep at it just because cooking is an awesome activity. The synthesis of a comprehensive whole from a bunch of elements and raw ingredients is amazing, you know? I think one thing though that allows me to try new things and work on my technique is the fact that I’m only cooking for myself. I figure that if I had to cook for another person I’d be much less likely to try something new, just because I don’t want to subject that person to something unexpected. What if I churn out a failure? Then two people end up screwed, eh?
Whenever I have to cook for other people I try to do things that I know are great. For example, whipping out a great oven roast is just awesome. Besides vegetarians and such, who doesn’t like a big slab of nicely done meat? In the end, doing something safe is kind of a good confidence booster. God knows, I kind of need it. Maybe it’s a reflection of how I function in other spheres of life, but I kind of feel like I lack true confidence in my abilities. For example, like I said last night, I was put in charge of Easter dinner. I ended up making a prime rib roast, baked spaghetti and meatballs, roasted baby potatoes, and a butterscotch apple cake. Each of these turned out OK, but I could have picked out one or two things that I could have done to make each one better. As much as the roast was well seasoned, I could have used some salt. The pasta was good, but more sauce would have made it awesome. The potatoes were great, but I could have cut down on the olive oil. The cake was decent, but not entirely all that pretty. As we ate as a family, my parents were telling me everything was good. In the back of my mind, I was wondering if they could pick out the flaws. Even if they could, they didn’t tell me; they were just appreciative that I went to all the trouble.
And therein came the realization.
If I’m cooking for other people, it doesn’t matter if something isn’t completely perfect; as long as I’m doing it from the heart, that alone outweighs any small deficiencies. And the fact that I’m looking to improve and churn out better things just makes it all even more worthwhile.
So yeah, I need to stow away any confidence issues when I cook. As long as I’m willing to make the effort and do the best I can, no one will hate me for it.
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