citizen of the planet

I didn’t really realize it right away, but an anniversary just came and went for me without much fanfare.  I suppose it doesn’t really warrant too much attention, but I feel like writing about it.  August 4th marks the day that I got possession of my condo; August 5th marks the day that I moved all of stuff into my newly acquired space.  That’s insane!  I still remember the craziness of the first month or two, just trying to get everything organized.  Depending on your point of view, I was either sensible or foolish in rushing to get the place furnished with the big items.  To me, it was important to get my comfort items purchased and in place.  For me, that was a decision that paid off.  I love the fact that my stuff is in line with what I deem to be my style, and not a mix of hand me downs.  All of that has certainly made my last year here that much easier to adjust to.  That’s not to say that I’m done–there’s still a fair amount of stuff here that I need to get furnished and settled, but I’m at a point where I’m content here.

Moving here, there’s been a lot for me to adjust to.  The obvious thing is the whole thing about living alone.  Even when I was away from the parents in Waterloo, I still had roommates that I had to deal with.  That itself had a lot of good things and bad things.  At that point I learned so much in terms of domestic life skills.  It certainly prepared me for this eventuality.  Now that I’ve been on my own for a year, I can honestly say that living on my own suits me just fine.  I almost feel like there’s something of a bit of sanctity about this space.  Even if I’ve had a bad day at work, or a rough run, or a harsh day socially, I love that I have a space that I can retreat to in order to unwind and recharge.  My place isn’t really that large, but it’s sufficient for me.  I tried sharing my space with a cat when I babysat Gloria, but in the end I just couldn’t deal with the feeling of another living creature in here.  Maybe if I had more space, you know?  Anyway, there is no judgment within these walls.  That’s important.  Perhaps it’s a different story outside of these walls.

Going from a detached house with the parents to a place where you have to be considerate of others was an adjustment.  On one side of my unit I have to deal with the passive aggressive woman.  If she was the norm, I’d probably already have gone crazy.  There’s an online forum for my neighbourhood, and there’s so much negative energy on there.  Fortunately, the forum and the neighbourhood aren’t entirely representative of my place.  The neighbours on the other side are a new family, and they’ve been friendly to me.  There are other small families that I run into regularly on my floor and we’re always cordial and polite to each other.  I’ve had to learn to adjust my habits too.  God, bringing a sound system with a subwoofer was a bad idea.  I can only imagine how much that annoyed the neighbour even if it was turned down to the lowest setting.  Of course, why didn’t she just come to talk with me?  Whatever.  I think we’re all used to each other now.  That’s a great thing.  I’m also used to this building.  God, there are a good number of things associated with this building that make me want to curse.  All the same, I’ve adjusted because I know that things can only get better.  The neighbourhood is changing.  There’s a lot of potential for growth around here, and I am a patient person.  Given time, I will be ready to climb the property ladder.  For now, I’m happy just being here.

There’s a lot going for the area.  I mean, being steps from a major subway line is insanely convenient.  If I was still out on the edges of this big city, I never would have taken up something like improv.  I’m slowly becoming more and more acquainted with the city at night.  That sounds kind of silly, but when I lived on the edges it was just far too much effort to do anything on a whim.  Now it’s a little bit easier.  Sure, I’m not downtown where all the action is, but it’s at least several times more accessible.

So yeah, one year at this address.  I don’t know how long I’m going to stay here before I get a major itch to relocate to better digs, but that’s something to worry about later on.  Meanwhile, I’m going to continue to do my best to live here with a positive attitude, taking the good and the bad and everything in between.

Just going to post a picture of the stand that was mentioned in the last post.  I’m quite happy with it since it seems to be smaller in depth compared to the old unit, and it has a lot of storage.  It means that I was able to clear out two different boxes from my Expedit shelf.  I still have to figure out what to fill those spaces with, but I like the fact that I have that option, know what I mean?  It feels sort of classy, and feels less of a stop gap measure than the other stand.

You know, as I was writing last night’s post, I actually fell asleep on my couch.  It was the first time I’d done so in a few weeks because I didn’t really want to fall asleep in a location with the possibility of the cat crawling all over my face.  I had a lot more to write about my experience with the cat, but I just didn’t get around to it before passing out.  So I suppose this post is really just a continuation.

So, a few days ago I wrote about how I seemed to be swaying back and forth over whether to help my friend out and make my place Gloria’s forever-home.  There was one incident though that kind of sealed the deal for me.  Bear with me, this is a bit of a winding story.

On Thursday, I took advantage of a sale at Leon’s.  I’ve been in need of a proper TV stand for a long time now.  On Thursday Leon’s put this credenza on sale.  It’s regularly $700, and for that day only it went for $350!  That’s insane!  I took the subway over to the local store and asked for that item.  They said that they didn’t have it in stock at that location, but if I was willing I could go to another location to pick it up.  I asked if it was something that could fit in my car and he told me it could.  I really didn’t want to spend $50 for delivery.  Anyway, I reserved the item, paid, then went to the other location.  I parked at the customer pick-up area.  I got them to bring the stand out.  When they opened the loading door to my car the guys could only laugh in disbelief.  “Umm…sir, there’s no way that unit can fit in your car.”  I laughed along and agreed.  Well, fuck.  Luckily they had some movers on hand.  They agreed to deliver the stand for the $50 fee.  I mean, at that point I already had my heart set on getting my stand on the same day, so I just decided to pay for convenience.  There was no way I’d have been able to get that stand any other way anyway.

So, when we arrived at my building they loaded it in the elevator and brought it up.  When I opened my suite, it was hot and humid.  It was also filled with the smell of some cat odour.  Privately, I was mortified.  I just got them to drop off the stand near the doorway.  I didn’t want them to spend much time in there.  I paid them and went on to get the stand set up.  Before I did though, I decided to go hunting for the source of the smell.  I checked around the box but didn’t find any puddles, and the litter box wasn’t particularly ripe.  I mean, I cleared that sucker out on a daily basis.  I didn’t find anything, so I just opened my balcony door to air my place out.  So, I unpacked the new stand, moved it next to the old one and started transferring things over.  After doing so I had to move the old stand out of the way.  When I did, I finally found the source of the odour.  There was a stray nugget of poo that must have been there for a few days.  Gross!  See, a few days before that she seemed to have accidentally shovelled out a turd.  I think she tried to shuffle it around and hide it.  In the process it must have broke into three pieces.  That same day I picked up two pieces without knowing of the existence of this third piece.  Anyway, I nonchalantly picked up this third piece and flushed it.  Almost immediately the air quality started improving.  That was pretty much the turning point for me.  If I come home worrying about how my place smells and whether guests might experience some odd smells on arrival, then that’s just not right.

I didn’t treat Gloria poorly on her remaining days here.  I still pet her and brushed her.  We really took a liking to each other.  Still, I just couldn’t keep up with the cleaning needed to keep her around.  I have enough trouble keeping the place tidy on my own.  The cat was just adding to the problem.  Plus, she helped me to identify what my tolerance levels were.  It became pretty clear that I don’t really have a good tolerance for messes that aren’t my own, know what I mean?  I think I’ve determined that I’m not really a pet person.  See, on emotional terms I’m great with pets; I can form bonds pretty easily.  On a practical level, I just can’t deal with the upkeep.  It doesn’t make me a bad pet owner, just someone that shouldn’t keep pets.  Gosh, does that make sense?

Obviously, I’m sad that it had to come to end like this.  Surely, part of me wishes that it could have worked out.  All the same, I’m happy that I have my place to myself.  I do enjoy my solitude you know.  It’ll take a while before my place feels normal again.  All I need is time.

Today, I went to Ikea and picked up a beige Egeby sisal rug. I needed a new one to replace the old one that I’ve had since moving in.  See, as much as the old one looked all right, it was very prone to shedding, and produced a ridiculous amount of lint that seemed to fly all over my condo’s floors with free abandon.  I thought that the shedding would die down as the lose fibres were picked off.  No, it never did die down; the carpet continued to shed as much as it did after the first week.  I decided that I wanted a sisal rug because I knew that the natural fibres would be likely to stay together.  I’ve been wanting to replace the old rug for ages, but I never found a good enough reason to do so…until today.  I suppose I have Gloria the cat to thank for that.  While she was with me she picked at the carpet like doing so was going out of style.  Part of me reasoned that as long as she was picking at the one item I didn’t want, she’d be less likely to claw any of my furniture.  True.  By the end of her stay, the carpet was totally looking worse for wear.  There was totally no reason to keep the old around anymore.

So, based one what I just wrote, it should be clear that Gloria’s no longer staying here.  She was picked up and taken back to where she came from.  It’s not as if she’s going with some total stranger.  No.  She’s really familiar with the old home such that I shouldn’t feel bad at all. It’ll take me a while to get comfortable with my space again, but I’ll get there.

I’m sitting here in my living room shivering under a blanket with a sweater on.  According to my thermostat the temperature in here has dropped to about 16°C.  Despite feeling chilly, I’m really in no mood to switch the heat on at the moment.  This is due to a couple of events earlier this morning.  Ever since I’ve moved here I’ve been trying to get my account with the chosen gas provider set up.  I’ve called many times, but they keep saying they’re working on getting my account into the system.  So, in these past seven months I’ve been going about my business without worrying about gas usage.

Today, I decided to do yet another follow up call with the gas company.  I decided though to look for my current gas meter reading just to help them along and prevent myself from getting an inflated bill.  I got word that the meter was in my mechanical closet, so I went outside and started poking around.  Unfortunately I didn’t see anything.  I ended up calling the builder to see if they knew where I should look.  The guy that answered told me that the meter was in the basement.  Hah.  He said he’d meet me downstairs to show me.  So, I went downstairs and we started hunting together.  We spotted it fairly quickly.  It took me a moment to zero in on the reading, but when I saw it I was in shock.  My gas reading happened to be 10-20 times larger than the surrounding meters.  Damn!  I immediately joked about wearing sweaters indoors from now on.  As soon as I got back to my suite I switched the heat off, and it’s been off since.

Prior to this, the heating has been on 24/7.  The thermostat was programmed properly, so it was low when I was out, and a bit warmer when I was in.  Even so, I’m amazed that the numbers went up that high in a period of 7 months–especially in comparison to everyone else.  So, that’s why I’m putting up with the chill, which really isn’t so bad now that I’ve sort of gotten used to it.  I don’t know why it didn’t occur to me to just switch the damn thing off.  So silly of me, right?  Well, going forward, I plan on being more careful.  It seems like it’s just another part of homeownership that I needed to learn first hand.

Just like I stated last year, at this time of year I have a tendency to avoid doing these run down type posts.  I tend to do these on my birthday, and usually it’s enough.  Thing is, I think for a year like this a little bit of navel-gazing is necessary.  There’s a lot of talk about this year being a tough one.  By and large, yes, it was tough.  With all of the doom and gloom, it can be easy for me to sink into a dark place.  There are, however, enough reasons for me to look up and forward.  That’s why it’s important for me to see what I’ve gone through.

This is one heck of an entry, so I’m placing it after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »

Last year, the keyword I used was “ignition.” It seemed appropriate at the time, but in the year that followed did I really burn as brightly as I wanted to? It’s really hard to tell. There were a lot of highs and lows throughout, and overall I’m in an interesting position. Without even discussing the possibilities lying at my feet, I have to say that to some extent I’m experiencing a slight paralysis. I don’t want to experience any regret with any decisions that I will make. So, I’m making an effort to really think things through. Nope…I don’t think it’s in my nature to really leap before I look.

So, OK, now that I’ve just turned 28 years old, what will be my keyword meditation for this year?  In my mind, I feel like I’ve planted many seeds in the past year.  They’ve been watered and are starting to sprout.  I’m going to have to spend a good amount of time nurturing everything.  Hopefully all of the growth will take me to higher places.  So, with that in mind I think my keyword will be “elevation.”  I’m hoping that all of the positive energy I’m trying to harness will bring me to higher and higher places.

When it comes to home life, I’ve already taken the big step of getting out there on my own.  I now have my own place to retreat to, and a proper mortgage.  Really, I don’t think there’s much that’s going to change in that area of my life.  If there’s any change to be had, it will have to do with how I utilize this space.  I’m not even talking about decor, but about how I can use this place as a springboard.  I’m closer to the heart of Toronto than I ever have been before, so why haven’t I ventured downtown more often?  There’s a theatre 9 stops down the subway line from me that offers improv classes.  I’ve always wanted to go and try it out, so why haven’t I signed up yet?  See?  There’s much potential related to my location that I haven’t realized yet.

As for the career, man, things have become downright strange.  Through a couple of twists of fate I’m suddenly the person on my team with the most of experience.  To the people that I know that are aware of my situation, I tell them that if that’s true that means that things are screwed!  On one level that’s something I say jokingly to get a laugh out of people.  However, secretly, I think I really mean it.  Currently, I don’t think I have the confidence to meet the new challenges that I will have to face.  That being said, I have no intentions of backing down and running.  I know no one who knows me will put any unreasonable expectations on me, so I will just have to hold my ground and do my best.  These are some interesting times.  I have no idea how the work landscape will change, but change will indeed come.

As I’ve mentioned in some recent posts, I’ve consciously been making an effort to get myself into a better state of health.  In the past month, I swear, I have finally found the keys to the solution that I’ve been looking for all this time.  Now it’s just a matter of keeping it up.  For running, I’m now passing on what I’ve learned to other people.  It’s really the least I can do to show my gratitude to the community that helped me learn to love running.  I will do my best to share my enthusiasm.  Soon enough though it’ll be time to try to reach for a new goal.  I keep saying that I’ll start training for a full marathon in May, but will I have the courage to go ahead and do it?  I have a couple of months to build up that courage.

Anyway, I guess that’s the trio of areas that I wanted to touch on in this entry.  I don’t know what the year will bring, but it seems like success will depend on me having the courage to initiate or grab onto opportunities that are available but not directly in front of me.  In all honesty, I guess I’m OK with that.  Nothing like a little effort, right?  Hopefully it will all take me to the new heights that I seem to desire.

I know, it’s a bit past midnight as I post this, but I’m marking this as Saturday’s post.  It’s a little bit of a cheat (again) but I’m OK with that.  Why the late post tonight?  Well, I just spent the last two hours constructing this cabinet over the left.  Nice, eh?  I’ve really been meaning to put a cabinet like this in there for the longest time.  That’s because the bathroom really doesn’t have all that much storage space.  At most, there’s just the vanity, but it’s not convenient to stash anything away there.  That’s where a cabinet like this comes in.  Anyway, the process of getting to that point wasn’t the easiest.

Earlier today I was at the local Canadian Tire looking for the Debbie Travis brand of this cabinet.  I saw a white one, but I wasn’t in the mood to make my bathroom have some sort of Nantucket feel.  No, thank you.  I checked with the clerk and they said that there was one available at another location on the Danforth.  When I heard that I was dreading the drive over, mostly because the road is always crowded and narrow.  So, I set out there but somehow managed to head in the wrong direction several times.  God knows how because Toronto roads are very grid-like.  I guess I just forgot whether the destination was further east or west.  Anyway, when I got there I got to the expected aisle only to find the damn Nantucket style cabinet.  I checked with a clerk who found that their only available one was the display model.  I asked about it and they were willing to take off $60.  Not a bad deal, however, I was really wondering how the heck I’d stuff it into my car.  I know my Corolla is capable of carrying a lot, but this thing?  Besides, the floor model was looking a little worse for wear.  So, in the end I ended up getting this Home Collections brand.

Now, like I said, I spent the past while putting it together.  I followed the instructions closely and it came together well.  I think I scratched my hardwood floor in the process though.  Dumb, dumb, dumb.  Once it was done I grabbed it and went to put it over the toilet.  Thing is…see that wood piece between the two back legs?  That actually blocked me from easily sliding it in.  Damn it!

I ended up having to partially disassemble the thing, take the legs and go over and behind, then place the cabinet part back on.  No, I suppose it wasn’t that bad, but I feel like the company should have noted that in the instructions.  I suppose I could have carried the whole cabinet up and over, but the bathroom ceiling isn’t that high.  Besides, I wasn’t going to risk having the whole lot collapse or fall apart–especially since I’m the only one working on the damn thing.

So, it’s in place, but I think I should really consider anchoring the thing to the wall.  I don’t want it to tip over once it’s loaded with stuff, you know?  Sounds great in theory, but I think I’ll end up being too lazy to care.  I’ll put stuff in there tomorrow morning.  For now, I’m just sleepy.