Continue reading »]]> It’s about 5:30 in the morning, which means that I’ve been asleep for about 11.5 hours. Yesterday, as soon as I got home from my parents’ place I just plopped down on my bed and passed out. I really only had two activities. In the morning I had my run, and in the afternoon I had my bread class. Both are really draining but manageable on their own. What I didn’t anticipate was the effect that both would have put together. So yes, I fell asleep at 6, woke up briefly at 2 a.m. to turn off the lamp besides my bed, and now here I am feeling like I missed something important. I think next time I have to work on keeping my energy levels up…or perhaps rely on stimulants. I can’t afford to lose 1/8 of the weekend like this, you know what I mean? Argh.

Continue reading »]]> My latest coaching gig began last night. It was the first night in a long time that I ran. If I think about it, it’s sort of embarrassing. I mean, to some extent I’m kind of an ambassador of sorts to the activity. And yet, there I was actually avoiding running for weeks. I was feeling a little bit shy to actually get out there. Well, shy or not, I just had to set that all aside. Compared to some of my previous clinics this is a relatively smaller one. All the same, I have to pump out the positivity. Every single bit matters, right?

On Monday night there was a really heavy dumping of snow in the Toronto area. By Tuesday the temperature rose well above freezing meaning that much of the snow had melted down into pools of slush on the sidewalks. During the run my clinic members gingerly sidestepped around everything. I tried to encourage them to just plow through the puddles. I set an example by doing so myself. I ended up with cold soaked shoes, but I didn’t mind. Nasty, but a good reminder about the joys of running through winter.

When I got back to the store, I got my street wear together and headed for the change room. As I sat down I started peeling off my cold socks. As I did my wrinkly shrivelled feet seemed to gasp for air. All of a sudden I had to just pause. I wasn’t about to cry or anything but I knew that there was a thought there that was begging for attention. I wasn’t really able to put it all together until I took a moment to focus. That’s when it finally came to me. The result was mildly melodramatic, but so damn eloquent. After my long absence from running, having done a run among everyone else at the store: I felt whole again.

Continue reading »]]> I really should have started writing this post a few days ago, but I didn’t feel like forcing myself to do it. The words weren’t flowing. Well, here I am on the final day of the year and I really need to get these words out. This year, 2011, was a bit of a harder one than the last. I remember declaring somewhere that it would be a year of buckling down and riding out tougher times. I was right. That’s not to say that this was a bad year for me. I’m just likely to label it as a challenging one. Did I rise to the challenges thrown at me? I think I did.

Anyway, enough blabber. In depth text follows…after the jump!

January

When I read back through the posts I wrote during this month, nothing really stood out to me. On the surface it seemed to be a status quo month for me. I was coaching the half marathon clinic back then, and that was good. I was also taking an improv class back then, and that was good as well. I do remember the one instance of throwing my boot at a teacher. Thing is, there was an undercurrent of stuff happening that I didn’t write about, except in a cryptic post or two. Basically, I was on the hunt for a new job at the time. I had had enough of the job at my old workplace and figured that staying stagnant was serving no one. Of course, I didn’t want to announce it or make a big deal of the hunt at the time, hence the weird posts.

February

This was an interesting month for me. Geez, I was a bit of a basket case. At the beginning of the month I gave my two-week’s-notice to my previous employer. My interview had gone well and the new company wanted me. Things happened really quickly. During the period where I was wrapping things up I was feeling odd. And after my last day I was actually feeling blue. It’s hard ending 4.5 years of service just like that, isn’t it? Luckily I had my improv classes going to distract me.

It was during this month that I had the final class show for the series of short form classes that I was taking. I also had the final class show for the beated script class that I was taking. I remember both class shows as being awesome. It’s so strange feeling the kind of energy you do up on stage. The audience is there, watching, and taking in every moment. Crazy!

March

March brought me to the end of another half marathon clinic. The race in Burlington was cold and wet, but it was great. It was the first half for many clinic members of mine, and I remember feeling immense pride at bringing them across the finish line. It didn’t matter that I almost got into a crash on the drive in. Pff.

I also started my new job this month. I think immediately I felt like I was fitting in well enough. At the time we also had visitors in from the UK so we were eating out constantly. The side effects were unfortunate, but regardless I felt like we were all getting along just fine. Anything would have been better than where I was before in terms of my mental state on the job. Uh huh.

April

Back in March, for kicks I participated in a small short film project for a friend. After a day of taping we left it all to him for processing. It was our goal to submit it to a small competition to see if we could win a prize. Well, when the event rolled around in April we actually won. Sure, the audience was sort of stacked with the director’s friends but all the same it was still fun to have it recognized. Besides that, improv classes continued on. I was taking a musical class at that point and that was challenging me in ways I didn’t expect. Taking a class like that is a good way to get over nervousness. I learned that ultimately it’s worth it to take a chance because even of people see me fall flat onto my ass it’s not the end of the world.

May

Hmm…I think this month is even more status quo. I see a lot of posts about overeating. I think during that month I hadn’t run for about two months and it was starting to affect me weight wise. It was a rough period, for sure. Ugh, and I see that there was a post about the side-effects of being backed up for days. Oh man, that was HORRIBLE. Resolution should not have taken as long as it did. Damn.

I continued to bake a lot that month, including these Irish cream glazed shortbread cookies. This seems to be the month where my friend convinced me to take the baking course at George Brown. I wasn’t sure at the time, but at least the seed was planted. And why not, right? Might as well get proper training for something I like doing.

June

Yet another class show took place this month. This one was for the second beated scene class I took. It was a mafia-themed show and I played a well-intentioned butcher that was caught up in this world. The costume involved me wearing an apron over a tank top. Seemed like I looked the part. Sure, why not? Overall it was a fun show and I enjoyed playing the role immensely.

That same night I had another gig across town. So right after the show I had to pack up me gear and take the subway out to the east end. All of the students from the short form class that I was with had banded together to for a troupe. We wanted to continue playing with each other and put on shows to keep our skills up. It so happened that that was the night of our first booked gig that featured our new gameplay format. It was a success. This format has stayed with us right through until the end of the year.

Ah, and if I wasn’t busy enough June also marked the start of another coaching cycle for me. This was a big group, and it was the first time I coached the half marathon group through the summer. Interesting times.

July

Our improv group was able to find a small theatre location down in a trendy part of town that allowed us to put on shows. In July we put on our first show at that location. It was a big success. It was enjoyable for all of us involved. We were all proud to be doing it on our own terms. We knew that we had something good going so we all have been working hard since to keep the momentum.

 August

In August I attended my first ever wedding as an adult guest. This was a rather big moment for me for the obvious reason. It was also a chance for me to really gauge my ability to handle social situations. To my relief I seem to have handled myself really well. It was a beautiful ceremony, for sure.

Coaching continued. I gave a lot of the talks during that month. I learned that I always need to prepare. Winging speeches is not something that should be done–especially if people have paid proper money be part of the clinic, know what I mean? All the same, I think my honest and open approach to coaching has saved my behind more than once. Uh huh.

September

My baking class at George Brown started this month. That meant that I always had a surplus of baked goods on hand. It doesn’t mean though that I stopped baking at home. I still baked a lot of great things, which included this cake. I was asked to make a surprise cake, and I sort of went all out. This was my first time making a fondant cake and I amazed myself. This was a crazy undertaking. I was proud of these results.

In September I participated in the taping of another short film for that same friend. My role involved me being creepy and wearing weird facial hair. We taped it in the heart of Toronto, so there was a lot of interference, but it was still enjoyable. All in all we really only got one scene taped that day, but at least my part was done. Up until now, the film isn’t done. With winter here, the remaining scenes won’t get taped for a while.

October

Oh wow, so October was a huge month for me in terms of beginnings. The big thing for me was really my introduction to CrossFit. My friends from Michigan had been doing CrossFit for a while and and they were adamant that it would be a good match for my personality. At the same time, my manager told me that he was signing up for the CrossFit bootcamp program at his local box. With influence from those two sources, I signed up for the bootcamp at my box. That month was a tough one, but so rewarding–so much so that I signed for a membership. Amazing stuff, really.

This month was also the end of the summer half marathon clinic. The clinic culminated in a race along the Toronto waterfront. Again, I was so proud to have so many people new to the half marathon cross the finish line. I was also immensely proud to have attained a new personal best.

November

So…this year I turned 30. Do I feel any different? No…though perhaps I feel like I’m free of any of the shackles associated with the label of being a 20-something. Sound odd? It should–I haven’t figure it out myself.

My baking class was in full swing in November. We were producing some genuinely amazing stuff, including this black forest cake pictured here. Sure, it looks cool, but if people only knew: it wasn’t entirely difficult to piece together. There’s a procedure and all, so really the hard part if just following instructions. That’s basically how the whole class was, really.

I got to test out my progress from the bootcamp this month, too. After one month of hard work I repeated a benchmark workout that we had done at the start of the bootcamp. When I repeated it I had cut my time in half. I swear, it was like I was possessed. I knew I was on the right path. That’s why I’m still doing CrossFit today.

December

And that brings me to this month. We had one improv gig this month. We had originally planned to do a Christmas themed show but due to commitments we weren’t able to get that show off the ground. Since we already had the venue booked we decided to spread the burden of performing for the whole 2 hours by inviting other groups to perform. We offered slices of time in the theatre. That night, three other groups got time. As a result, that night was relatively stress-free for us. We enjoyed ourselves thoroughly.

So there you go. That was my 2011 in condensed form. If I could summarize it all up: 2011 had many improv gigs, much bitching about weight, a lot of coaching people to succeed in big endeavours, and a fair bit of packing on muscle. I hope that 2012 will bring more success and further transformation into who I am meant to be.

Continue reading »]]> A couple of days ago I was at a restaurant up north of the city. I was meeting with a lot of my running buddies. We were having a Christmas drinks get together. All in all it was enjoyable. The bar was crowded at the time–there was a good energy permeating the place. It was there that a whole bunch of them were really trying hard to convince me to take on the next half marathon class. A few days prior to the party the store manager emailed me and asked if I was interested in taking on the class. I mean, I’ve done it three times before so I have a good sense of how things should go. All the same, there was a part of me that wanted to give it a pass. I wanted to take a break and focus on other things. I wasn’t sure what to do so I posted a question on Facebook asking my contacts for some guidance. The general response was that I had had enough rest and that I should accept. At the very least it would encourage me to at least continue running. Ever since my last race I’ve only gone for a run once. Terrible, eh? People have been telling me to get my ass back out there. I must say that I agree.

Anyway, back to the get together. That night so many people asked me to do it. They were all talking in positives. By the end of the night, I wasn’t entirely ready to commit but they really swayed me. Two days later I replied back to the manager and told him that I’d take it. There! Done deal! This class starts at the end of January. It’s far enough away that it satisfies my needs to get away for a while. What will be my goal for that class? I want to continue playing up the loud positive persona that I’ve taken up in my coaching duties. I want to stress to the class the idea of how both fast and slow people are worthy of respect. I want to continue making sure that I have contact with all people in the group despite the fact that I cannot move at a speed that would allow me to actually run with the front people. I’ve got so many ideas. Next year will be great.

Continue reading »]]> I haven’t really written much about it, but as a way of celebrating my 30th I decided to sign up for and race a half marathon. Well, maybe that’s misguided because it would imply a bit of cause and effect. Now, I think I was going to sign up for the race anyway, and that it landed on my birthday is just an interesting coincidence. Just like in previous years I chose to run the Angus Glen Half Marathon. It’s still a good race with a good buffet. It’s still a small race meaning that my stats actually put me close to the bottom of the heap. Bah, no matter. I know that I’m happy with the results–especially this year’s results.

Let’s see.

I went into the race expecting very little. I did a great job with my previous race three weeks prior, but I didn’t anticipate that I’d get a new personal best here. I hadn’t really run much in between races, so I was feeling a little bit out of practice. I told myself I’d try to stay with the 2:15 pacer, but only if it made sense. Just so happened that the 2:15 pacer was someone that I knew from the store. Well, I didn’t see him at the starting line so I decided to just relax and do my thing: 10 & 1′s, aiming for somewhere between 2:15 and 2:20. Well, a little bit past the 1K mark I was nudged by the 2:15 pacer and another guy from the store. Hah, what luck to run into them! I asked if they were taking walk breaks and they said no. At that point I was almost ready to just let them go until the pacer told me to just join him. It was at that point where my original race plan just went up in a puff of smoke. Oops. So, I knew that with walk breaks I’d have to run faster than usual to maintain a particular average pace required to hit 2:15. If I was running it straight through I knew that I could afford to ease up a little. I think that’s what convinced me to take on this new challenge.

From about 4K onward we all started commenting on how hot things were getting. Yeah, no kidding. When I left my place it was about freezing, but at that point it felt more like it was 10°C. There was a lot of concern that I’d overheat. I was foolish enough to have pinned my bib to my jacket, so I figured I was in a bad state and that I’d have to put up with it. The other guy with the pacer insisted that I just take off the jacket and that he’d carry it. Well, I mean, odd offer, right? I totally didn’t want to impose, but he insisted. See, this guy has a reputation as being a sherpa for a few other runners. In the past he’s kindly hauled gear while running with other people in need of help. I wouldn’t have imagined that he’d help me out. So, since he insisted I got the jacket off. He got the bib off the jacket then asked for my water belt. I handed that over as well. I felt magically unencumbered. I felt like I could focus once more on running. About a minute later he gave my belt back with the bib attached to it. Nice. From that point, he seemed to take it upon himself to stick with me and watch that I had everything I needed. He made sure my gel intake was timed well, and that I was taking in enough water. There was one time I passed a water station with unhelpful attendants. I ended up empty handed and grunted in frustration. He went back, got me a cup or two of water then raced back to get the cup to me. Nice!

So, at about 12-14K I knew I was struggling. The hilly terrain was wreaking havoc on my legs. I was tempted to slow down and walk, but I didn’t want to disappoint myself. And I didn’t want to let my friend down who was giving up his run to help me out. I kept at it. By about 16K or so I recovered well enough and just kept at it. I yelled: “there is no pain, just movement!” It was true at that time. The pacer was long gone at that point, but that was expected. He had to stay on plan for other people that were following him. Over the last few hills I could feel my legs turning leaden. I told myself I had no choice, so I just kept a rhythm going as best I could. And finally in the last stretch I knew that I didn’t need to hold anything back so I tried to crank out whatever I had left. In the end, my resulting chip time was 2:21:12.5. That’s less than a minute and a half from being a personal best. It didn’t matter that I didn’t set a new personal record for myself because I knew that running the whole damn thing without stopping was a big feat for me. I was giddy.

There you go. That’s my story for this race. This is my 10th half marathon. I know that there will be many more in the future. I will be ready.

Continue reading »]]> We had a great turnout tonight at the post-race celebration dinner. I swear, this really was a celebration. Everyone that was there was in such a positive headspace. We were all sharing stories about our race results. It’s like everyone regaled each other with tales of triumph and perseverance. From what I heard a good number of people in the clinic actually attained a time of less than two hours. Given that the average is about 2:09, under 2 hours is rather fast. We had one person actually come in under 1:30. I know I say it every clinic, but this truly was a speedy clinic. I’m a bit sad that it’s over, but it’s time to let go. I’ve done a great job and they’ve benefitted. This downtime is my time to re-centre.

Continue reading »]]> Days before the race I wasn’t feeling nerves like I might normally would. It all finally hit me the night before. And it didn’t manifest in the form of an overactive mind. Instead, I barely got any sleep. My body was buzzing with anticipation preventing me from getting into a deep sleep state. By the time I got up, I started piecing all of my gear together.

When I got to the race, I could feel the excitement in the air. After dropping off my bag I hiked over to a hotel lobby which was our designated meeting spot. I started running into a lot of my clinic members. Each one was filled with a personal mix of excitement and nerves. For many of them this was their first half marathon. I was entirely proud of each of them. At one point the whole hotel lobby broke out into cheers. I looked around and there was Fauja Singh and his entourage. Mr. Singh had just turned 100 years old and was planning on running a full marathon. Totally inspirational.

Minutes before gun time we started heading to our corrals. I was in the last corral along with a bunch of other people I knew. We were taking pictures and having a great time. As I looked around I saw some worried faces. I kind of wanted to go up to them and cheer them on but I’m sure some of them would have told me to fuck off. No problem though. I mean, I was there once. I totally get it. And just like that the race started. I think it took me about 11-12 minutes to cross the starting line from where I was. That’s the longest interval between the gun and me crossing the starting line that I’ve encountered so far.

In terms of the race, mine was rather average. I started out slow to get the kinks out. By 5K or so I was feeling good so I started picking up the pace. I was able to maintain things at about 6:00-6:15/km for a good while. I was amazed at just how many more people were around me than when I was running a bit slower farther back. It makes a huge difference. At the rate I was going I was headed to about a 2:17 race. At about 16K, that’s when the fatigue kicked in. I knew it was coming, so instead of panicking I worked things out in my head. I told myself to run slower but pick it up once I’ve worked through it. Somewhere after 16K though there was an aid station that was giving away gels. The ground after that station was entirely sticky. My legs didn’t like that at all. I slowed down by a fair amount through that area, and it took me a while to regain some of my speed. Combined with the fatigue though I don’t think I returned back to where I was. I just couldn’t. I tried, but my body wouldn’t let me. It was at that point that I knew I was facing my usual battle against time slipping away from me.

Every now and then I reminded myself to try pushing again to see if I could get back up to speed. Sometimes I was successful, but slowed back down. By the last kilometre I was doing so many calculations in my head. I was trying to figure out what my likely arrival time would be. I think that’s when I my mind fell briefly into panic mode. The smile went from my face and all I could think was “WTF WTF WTF.” When I saw the sign saying there was 500 metres left. I pushed harder. There’s un underpass in that stretch. In the darkness I felt like I was on drugs. It was a really odd feeling. According to my watch I knew that I could achieve a new personal best if I just kept at it. That was my incentive. Never mind about 2:15, or 2:17: I just wanted to beat my old time of 2:20:19. Just before the finish line I raised my arms in amazement. I did it! I had beaten my old time! I made it in 2:19:46. That’s 33 seconds! It’s not as wide a margin as I wanted, but it’s still a sign of improvement nonetheless. I was so happy.

I was on the verge of tears but I kept it in. My arms and teeth were buzzing. I stuck around the finish chute looking for others from my group. There were some strangers that were in tears or looking worn out. I made it a point to smile at them and congratulate them. They smiled back. I hope I was able to brighten someone’s experience, at least. When I finally ran into someone I knew, the floodgates opened, and I shed a few tears myself. I couldn’t help it. I was just in a weird state at that point. I stuck around longer and saw more and more of the clinic members come in. High fives and hugs were given freely. It was a wonderful time.

Eventually we decided to head over to pick up our bags, which was a terrible experience. The baggage check this year was so poorly organized. It should not take one hour of standing in cold winds to pick up a bag. That was piss poor and must have turned off a lot of people doing this race for the first time, you know? I claimed my prepaid massage and had the guy work on my calves specifically. He was able to find a lot of sore spots. Though…now I kind of wish I got him to focus on my quads and hamstrings. My calves are fine now, but the bigger muscle groups are still sore.

So yeah, that was the STWHM for this year. Generally this race hasn’t been one where I’ve generated personal bests so I’m just amazed I made it out of this one with an improvement. More than anything I’m so happy that so many of my clinic members made it across. They all worked so hard to get that point. It all paid off.

Continue reading »]]> Hahahah. Oh dear.

Yes, I did manage a new personal record, but it’s not by as wide a margin as I wanted. In fact, I beat my old time by a small sliver of about 33 seconds. Oh, not that I’m complaining–just stating.

Anyway, I do plan on writing all about it, but not tonight. I’m far too sleepy/fatigued/zonked out to get a lot of coherent stuff out. Let’s just put it this way: I can afford to sleep well enough tonight.

Yes!

Continue reading »]]> Is racing becoming old hat for me? Naw, that’s not the right term. I mean, that would suggest that races are no longer exciting, but they are. The anticipation and the hard work of training for the event is part of the fun. I’m just saying that I’m not as nervous about the details as I used to be. To some extent I have a good idea of what to expect, so I know that I’ll encounter X and I’ll have to do Y to take care of it. I’m a bit better equipped to handle whatever the race throws at me, so I feel like I can focus on enjoying my time out there more. Is that such a bad thing? I’ve put in so much time and effort into helping others achieve their goals such that when it comes to my own goals I can afford to let them be less pressing. This is a good thing. Some races where you’re able to drop all expectations are often the ones that return the best results, know what I mean?

All of this is a roundabout way of saying that I feel good about tomorrow’s race. Full plans to enjoy it.

Continue reading »]]> Back on Tuesday, I stood in front of my running group for the final time in this clinic. I was animated as I tried to give last minute tips to my group of soon-to-be racers. My group was cheerful and in good spirits. And just like that the talk ended and they were all out for their 10K run. At some point I was sort of expecting to feel somewhat sad about the fact that it was all over. I mean, I was pretty happy with this group. They were enthusiastic and responded well to my style of coaching. So, knowing how I function I really thought that I’d somehow get emotional. I’m glad that I didn’t though. I was happy to send them out. I know I did a great job. A large portion of them are running a half marathon for the first time on Sunday. I have absolutely no doubt that these people are ready! They’ve trained earnestly and honestly over the past 17 weeks. All of the effort will surely pay off. I no longer play a role in their performance–it’s all up to them. Job well done, Jason. A time for rest will arrive soon enough.