Category Archive: academia

Open paths, closed paths

The job hunt continues, though I don’t think that I’m going to make my self-imposed deadlines. Well, such is life. Then again, I’ve only started increasing the intensity of the search recently, so I’m not expecting immediate results.

It’s all given me cause to reflect on the paths I chose during my studies. Comp Eng has a lot of paths you can focus on. I tried turning my focus to low level electronics. I thought it would be a good field for me, however, I seriously didn’t enjoy it. I disliked the amount of math associated with the communications courses, so I avoided that series of courses. I tried one of the controls courses, but I didn’t do so well. In the end, my focus was on software and computer structures. I don’t regret because I think taking other courses would have increased my stress level to horrible levels, which says a lot considering I was already rather stressed with the courses I did take.

Anyway, my choices back then are affecting what I’m capable of applying to. A lot of adults I talk to are asking whether I’ve gotten a job at RIM yet. Well, I’ve applied, but that was quite a while back. I don’t think I’m suited to that company anyway. It seems that the majority of the classmates that found jobs there took those comunications courses that I didn’t want. Oh well–company’s loss, you know. Same story for those big-wig hardware companies. I don’t think I have good chances with them either.

So, I guess that leaves software jobs, but to be honest I’m not sure how I feel about doing programming for a living.

Well, life will take me where I need to go, you know? Just takes a bit of time.

Before and after

Heh, so I guess my last few entries since Japan have been pretty similar and all downers. I blame sickness! Anyway, please allow me to reflect a little bit more on the idea of “before” and “after” as it applies to me now.

Right now is an interesting time for me. I mean, it’s wholly a transitional period. I was thinking about this the other day. The end of my educational career is a big marking point. I can think of my life as being pre and post this flag. As if to further strengthen the “before” and “after” sense of mind, the trip to Japan really…mmm…seemed to book-end things quite nicely. The trip itself wasn’t wholly life-altering, although, it certainly changed my views of self-worth and what I’m made of (besides blood and guts). This new phase hasn’t even truly begun yet, so I can’t talk about life “after”. However, looking at “before”, some things that used to be important now (rightly) feel like they are firmly in the past. It’s a weird feeling. It’s like a door behind me has been shut and now I’m standing in a big open field, with nothing identifiable on the horizons. I don’t know where to head! It’s frustrating.

Exeunt

Convocation was today. It was long. It was hot outside. I have my diploma.

Well, I suppose I have more to say than just that. It was great to see people (in many cases, for the last time) again in the robing room. It made me somewhat nostalgic. I admit though that in many cases I had already forgotten people’s names. Heh. Can’t fool me though, I know that many people had forgotten my name in comparison to me forgetting theirs. Though, I suppose I shouldn’t be proud of that at all.

The ceremony came and went. It was long, and somewhat uninteresting. The speakers said a lot of things that were snark worthy, but all I could do was produce stifled sarcastic giggles. I mean, all things considered, I could have summarized the speakers thusly: donate money, make a difference/run for public office, naked body covered in chocolate sauce, donate money. Of the four, I bet you can’t tell which one came from the valedectorian. Ha!

When I was handed my diploma, the president of UW asked me what I had in store in the future. I was…stumped. I wasn’t expecting a question. All I could muster was a hearty “I have no clue.” He looked like I was from outer space. Whatever. Hell, it’s not like that guy really personally cared about my answer.

Once the ceremony ended, I found Henrick and we returned our gowns quite promptly. I just wanted to get out of that thing. When I found my mom, she rued the fact that she didn’t get to take any close photos of me in my gown. Honestly, it didn’t matter to me all that much, although I recognize that it really meant a lot to her. I kind of regret it, but can I do, you know? I made a promise though that I would pose for a few good photos with my diploma here at home.

Anyway, this act of the grand play is at an end. People are heading off to build foundations for the start of the rest of their lives. So too will I, though I haven’t written the script.

Exeunt

New highs

All the marks have arrived. I hit an average of 79.53: essentially an 80. That’s bleeding insane. This was my best term ever. I suppose though that it all really doesn’t matter anymore, you know?

It’s Friday now. I’m in a bit of shock over just how quickly this week passed by. It’s quite alright though. Things will fall into place as time moes forward. Meanwhile, I’m content to just enjoy this downtime while I have it.

Low responsibility

Hmm…I wonder how long it will take before the fact hits that I’m finished with my undergrad business. Some of my marks have come in already. Out of 6 courses, 4 have reported…and so far I have an average of about 85. That is unbelievably insane. If my remaining two courses return an average of about 71 among themselves, I’ll end up with something at 80 or above. It’s not a sure thing, but surely it’s not out of the realm of possibility either. I’m pleased, especially considering that this term was relatively quite the breather, despite some all-nighters, nervous breakdowns and the like.

Moving was relatively quick and painless. Everyone helped out, which was a nice surprise. I haven’t yet unpacked. I don’t think I will for at least a few more days. I’ve been sleeping in for long periods. Today I slept in until 4 p.m. That’s a bit much. However, I might as well take a few days to enjoy this life of low responsibility for a little bit. Soon enough I’ll be on the job hunt. Meanwhile…this is life. And life is good.

After all…

Sigh. I can’t label the exam as a big ‘O’. Nope. Still an ‘X’. Even so, the exam was easier than I had thought it would be. Good news then. I deemed my work to be 50% worthy. As such, I believe that I am now finished.

Done.

Holy crap. That’s it.

I think I need a nap. I damn well deserve it, don’t I?

Never been so scared

I swear, I have never been so scared of a final in my entire life. This is my final of finals, and I am so unready to face it. I’ve been studying hard for it, but nothing is clicking. It makes me wonder whether my mind has put some sort of mental block up that is preventing me from wanting to take in the information. I’m already thinking of worst case scenarios.

If I fail this course…

  • I will end up missing convocation with the peers that I’ve been with for five years.
  • I will have to stay behind for one more year.
  • I know I will have passed my other courses with a 60+ average, meaning I’ll be taking this course, with 4 other time wasting courses.
  • I will have to have spent another $4500 on tuition for another term.
  • I will be stuck relearning this wretched course.
  • I will be forever embittered to this school for being so heartless.

However…

None of this has happened yet.

I’m honestly not confident about this exam. I’m almost in tears about my state. I’ve tried hard…and yet I can’t possibly come out on top. All I can do is pray that the prof will be lenient. My future is in his hands, and I don’t like it one bit.

Worst course ever

This being my final of finals, I can unequivocally state that ECE 429 is perhaps the worst course that I’ve ever taken. It’s even worse than the database course that I mentioned a few entries back. The course notes are horrid. I’m reading the material, but none of it is being absorbed. It is difficult to discern just what types of questions are going to be asked based on the material. It’s an exercise in pulling teeth.

Oh well. After exams like Developmental Psychology and Japanese, it’s about time for a tough exam.

Older posts «

» Newer posts

Switch to our mobile site