Just like I said a few days ago about needing to be in a cocoon now and then to do domestic stuff, I actually stayed at home today. I’ve been decked in a tank and sweats all day, cooking, listening to music, lying on the couch napping, watching TV, and being in a heightened state of meditativeness. I’m usually one who encourages this type of thing now and then but now at the end of the day I’m sort of regretting not doing more. Part of me is feeling like I would have been better off if I had at least left the confines of my place. Would it have killed me to get some fresh air? My parents called and were wondering about the next time I’d drop by. I actually passed on going today thinking that I needed time to bum around and do nothing. And so I got the time…why am I not happier about it? A friend suggest going to a mall at some point. I passed it up letting my inertia win out. Maybe I should have gone out and gotten some exercise.

I know, it starts to sound whiny when I talk about things this way. For better or for worse, deep down what I wanted to do was just get some isolation today. Instead of complaining about it, I just need to take ownership over it. Tomorrow is another day, and it looks like it’ll be a busy one finding me away from home for a good number of hours. Perhaps I can consider today as a way of balancing out the weekend.

Mission accomplished then? Bah.