I’m sure that part of the whole mystique about unnatural fair foods comes from all of the hype leading up to the event. I mean, weeks before the The Ex even opened there were stories about the crazy food offerings being made to the general public. Stories about the Krispy Kreme burger were pretty damn ubiquitous in the online newspapers and Toronto-based blogs. Hype! I wasn’t even aware that I wanted to try the deep-fried Cola and deep-fried Cherry Aid up until they both got major press. So, knowing that I was heading to The Ex I knew that part of my goal was to try out a couple of the hyped food items just to satisfy my curiosity.

My buddy and I went and we agreed to share the food items, just to allow prevent either of us from ingesting an ungodly amount of calories. In the end we didn’t really try any of the over-hyped things. We still got our share of some odd items though. I wanted to take pictures of some of them but my camera was dead. Always charge your batteries prior to events, folks. I did get some shots with my phone though.

So, first item we had was the d.f. mac & cheese curds. We originally wanted the d.f. mac & cheese balls, but they were all out. How hard would it be smush together a bunch of pasta any fry it anyway? I think we were expecting something gooey or something with a stronger cheese hit, but we didn’t get it. It was OK, but nothing to write home about. Describing it as d.f. elbow macaroni with bits of cheese would have been more accurate, but good luck fitting that on the sign.

Second item we tried was the taco in a bag. Sounded promising, and honestly it was OK. They took a bag of Doritos, broke ‘em up slightly, then added the usual taco toppings like shredded lettuce, beef, tomato, cheese, and sour cream. It’s pretty much how you’d think it would taste, which isn’t a bad thing. I think the only gripe is that we sort of wished it was warmer. Couldn’t be helped. We ate this over at a table by the pierogi stand. I think in the process of eating it we got hungry for the pierogies so I ordered 7 pieces. They were all right. Kind of greasy, but honestly after the d.f. mac and cheese I was in no position to balk at oil at that moment.

I think we needed a bit of a break at that moment, so we ventured outside. We ended up hunting for the Sweet Treats stand. I think I was hunting for the legendary d.f. butter balls but mercifully my friend ended up ordering the d.f. brownie instead. They must have taken a brownie, squished it onto a stick into a tube, battered it, then fried it. Coming out it looked like a corn dog. It was easy enough to cut with another skewer. It was warm, gooey, and honestly not that bad. Would I eat it again? Maybe. It’s not like eating this is a daily occurrence.

As I stood by the booth waiting I could hear people passing by going “Eww! D.F. butter? I wanna puke just thinking about it!” Seriously? I swear, there’s a part of me that thinks these people are saying this just because it’s socially acceptable. People may not want to sound like a glutton so they exclaim out loud that they’re too good for such things. As if. You know that secretly they’re wishing they had the freedom to taste it. Pff.

Later that evening I stopped by the chicken and chips booth near the midway. For $10 I ordered the fries and three chicken tenders. As he scooped the fries he asked if I wanted gravy. I absent-mindedly said yes. Little did I know that that added $2 to the price. Server got me, and he knew it. Asshole. Food was decent (for what it was), and probably the best thing I’d had all day. Still, the gravy didn’t taste as good as I thought it would.

So yeah, that was my eating adventure. I didn’t try anything that was over-hyped and I’m OK with that. Only means that next time I can narrow things down and figure out what I really want to try.